We are used to thinking of thinking as a good thing, as that which makes us human. It can be quite a revelation to discover that so much of our thinking appears to be boring, repetitive, and pointless while keeping us isolated and cut off from the feelings of connection that we most value.
Our inner critic works like a prison guard to provide a minimum of safety against some exterior threat. Even-mindedness is the sure way to peace, since it enables us to disinvest from both external praise and blame. Also, it’s fruitless to try to avert criticism, since it’s inevitable. And we can’t always be sure someone’s actually criticizing us.
Actually, our ego wants to “attach” to external praise, while it wants to “avert” criticism. It’s always unhealthy to be dependent on outside approval. Defensive thinking cuts us off from the present and prevents us from dealing with others authentically, since we’re focused on getting a certain reaction from them, not simply engaging with them.
Observation and mindfulness can be keys to unlock the doors of practiced defensive thinking.
Consistently open the channel to that inner nurturing presence, stay present as you experience life, and get behind the critic’s reason for being.
As a result, you can liberate yourself from a defensive life. What ultimately matters, is your soul and what you have inside. What ultimately matters, is what values and what human sensibilities you carry deep inside you and how much you feel the burning desire not only to succeed in life but also to share and give back to as many as you can, experiences, knowledge, feelings, a helping hand in a difficult moment…
It also gives us strength and willpower to continue and support positive change in the lives of people. This is not the end; this is a new beginning for all of us.